Hello, even though this reviewer seemed to be out of my target audience, thought I'd address the review anyway. I don't think it would be fair addressing only pleasant reviews that are complementary and I like to read ;)
This is the Review. I sent the book to some readers on goodreads who said they would like to read the book and signed up for it via a link:
This is the Review. I sent the book to some readers on goodreads who said they would like to read the book and signed up for it via a link:
DNF at 60%
I have received the books from the author in exchange for an honest review.
Please also note that all of the quotations are exactly as they have appeared in the book.
Love So Menacing is a third book in the Surreal Blue Rogue Agent series by E.R. Bain and a second book that I have attempted to read. Please note the word “attempted” because while I somehow managed to finish book I, this one was a definite DNF. In all honesty, since I have found the first book a mess and already wrote the review, writing another one was not on my agenda, however, there are several things about this book that were eating at me, compelling me to get it off my chest so here we do.
To start with, the author needs to learn the difference between surreal (strange, odd, unreal, dreamlike fantastic) and ludicrous (absurd, ridiculous, prepostreous, farcical, foolish, stupid) because that is exactly what this book is. Just a small example – our “hero” Victor is able to morph in to a “ginormous” were-bear with the paws the size of Toyota Lancer (Well, since we are in a rough terrain, would Cruiser –size paws be more appropriate? No? OK, this is your fantasy ). As a were-bear, he carries his human son in his mouth and:” In a haze of loathing he swallawed the small boy”! Well, at least a bit later he manages to regurgitate him , so ” Nikolai slid out on a puddle of oozing saliva”
But even this double “Yuck” factor was not what what stopped me. It all came down to sex. I am an adult, not a prude (or at least I think I am not) and of the opinion that a well-written erotica can add a bit of spice to life. In saying that, I am also a woman and a parent, so in a field of erotic romance, for me there is one unbrakable, non-negotiable rule: any erotic interaction is to be between CONCENTING ADULTS . For me , Love So Menacing broke this cardinal rule. The first brake came when Audriana reminices about the time she tried to audition as a pole-dancer/stripper in a club in front of the owner. The scene itself is quite erotic and descriptive. What made me want to scrub my eye-balls, is that it was stated that at that time Audriana was 15 years old, and the owner 17 years old!!!! Just few chapters further we encounter a character named Lincoln in the following situation as he comes home : “ When he was able to make out the sounds of sex and familiar voices on the other side of the door, he blanched. He gritted his teeth. Raised his fist, prepared to pong up a storm at the door...... He forced himself to bring it down to his side”. And then we find out that behind that closed door that Lincoln was reluctunt to break down, HIS 15 AND 16 YEAR OLD SONS WERE HAVING ORAL AND ANAL SEX WITH THE 19 YEAR OLD NANNY! Well, at least he fired the nanny, even if his partner got in to snit becouse it was done without consulting him (the partner). And this is when I have slammed this book down never to open it again.
The availability of a self- publishing elctronic option created for me, as a reader, great opportunity as well as great pitfall. I have been fortunate enough to discover some amazing new authors whose work brought me countless hours of pleasure and whose books will always find place on my shelves- be they physical or electronic. Unfortunately, the same option removed some restrictions and filters, whicih allowed through books that should not be able to see the light of the day and for me Love So Menacing was such book.
E.R Bain, EVEN THOUGH CALLED YOUN ADULTS, 15 and 16 YEARS OLD ARE STILL CHILDREN, SO DONT YOU EVER AGAIN DARE TO SEXUALISE CHILDREN IN YOUR BOOKS AND CALL IT Salaciously Seductive ROMANCE. Don’t you ever again dare to make reader feel dirty reading one of your books as you did with me. And don’t you ever again offer me one of your books: in a writer – reader relationship, this reader wants a divorce due to the irreconcilable differences.
I have received the books from the author in exchange for an honest review.
Please also note that all of the quotations are exactly as they have appeared in the book.
Love So Menacing is a third book in the Surreal Blue Rogue Agent series by E.R. Bain and a second book that I have attempted to read. Please note the word “attempted” because while I somehow managed to finish book I, this one was a definite DNF. In all honesty, since I have found the first book a mess and already wrote the review, writing another one was not on my agenda, however, there are several things about this book that were eating at me, compelling me to get it off my chest so here we do.
To start with, the author needs to learn the difference between surreal (strange, odd, unreal, dreamlike fantastic) and ludicrous (absurd, ridiculous, prepostreous, farcical, foolish, stupid) because that is exactly what this book is. Just a small example – our “hero” Victor is able to morph in to a “ginormous” were-bear with the paws the size of Toyota Lancer (Well, since we are in a rough terrain, would Cruiser –size paws be more appropriate? No? OK, this is your fantasy ). As a were-bear, he carries his human son in his mouth and:” In a haze of loathing he swallawed the small boy”! Well, at least a bit later he manages to regurgitate him , so ” Nikolai slid out on a puddle of oozing saliva”
But even this double “Yuck” factor was not what what stopped me. It all came down to sex. I am an adult, not a prude (or at least I think I am not) and of the opinion that a well-written erotica can add a bit of spice to life. In saying that, I am also a woman and a parent, so in a field of erotic romance, for me there is one unbrakable, non-negotiable rule: any erotic interaction is to be between CONCENTING ADULTS . For me , Love So Menacing broke this cardinal rule. The first brake came when Audriana reminices about the time she tried to audition as a pole-dancer/stripper in a club in front of the owner. The scene itself is quite erotic and descriptive. What made me want to scrub my eye-balls, is that it was stated that at that time Audriana was 15 years old, and the owner 17 years old!!!! Just few chapters further we encounter a character named Lincoln in the following situation as he comes home : “ When he was able to make out the sounds of sex and familiar voices on the other side of the door, he blanched. He gritted his teeth. Raised his fist, prepared to pong up a storm at the door...... He forced himself to bring it down to his side”. And then we find out that behind that closed door that Lincoln was reluctunt to break down, HIS 15 AND 16 YEAR OLD SONS WERE HAVING ORAL AND ANAL SEX WITH THE 19 YEAR OLD NANNY! Well, at least he fired the nanny, even if his partner got in to snit becouse it was done without consulting him (the partner). And this is when I have slammed this book down never to open it again.
The availability of a self- publishing elctronic option created for me, as a reader, great opportunity as well as great pitfall. I have been fortunate enough to discover some amazing new authors whose work brought me countless hours of pleasure and whose books will always find place on my shelves- be they physical or electronic. Unfortunately, the same option removed some restrictions and filters, whicih allowed through books that should not be able to see the light of the day and for me Love So Menacing was such book.
E.R Bain, EVEN THOUGH CALLED YOUN ADULTS, 15 and 16 YEARS OLD ARE STILL CHILDREN, SO DONT YOU EVER AGAIN DARE TO SEXUALISE CHILDREN IN YOUR BOOKS AND CALL IT Salaciously Seductive ROMANCE. Don’t you ever again dare to make reader feel dirty reading one of your books as you did with me. And don’t you ever again offer me one of your books: in a writer – reader relationship, this reader wants a divorce due to the irreconcilable differences.
Response:
To tell you the truth, when I first read this review I
doubled over in laughter. It was so funny, I decided to post it here so that it
doesn’t go missing throughout the years when my books become popular, people
are rushing to buy it on release day and it has so many reviews that I can’t
find it.
This is even funnier than when spam mail was junk mail you
actually got in the post box. Once I received a letter stating that I was one
of the smartest people in the world and they wanted me to join a secret
organization in New York City. I doubled over laughing on my bed and fell to
the ground. It was the funniest piece of writing I had ever read. Do people
actually, really fall for those things? I had torn it up and dumped it in the
trash. But I always regretted not keeping it, or making a copy of it before I
threw away the original letter. That taught me my lesson. So now I have posted
this review for all time.
I guess when you are a reader, you are on the other spectrum
of literature. You are not familiar with writing styles of techniques.
For those who have not read the book, this is the scene with
Lincoln and Rees. If this reviewer had read all three titles, (and to be honest
it doesn’t seem that this person actually read even 10% of my novel, but I
won’t fault this person because it seems this reviewer is not a fan of my genre)
they would know that Lincoln is a prominent main character. He, is also a
homosexual.
This, I might add, is one of the most brilliant and well
written scenes in my book Love So Menacing. And I’m glad to share it with you
today.
To be fair I left it as is as the reader would have gotten
it. I plan to read it through regularly to make corrections over the next few
years.
CHAPTER 10
Lincoln
entered his fifteen acreage home late evening in the secluded, gated community
of the Georgia suburb that he lived in with Rees and three kids. The interior
was a mix of Bohemian and modern decorating style.
He
walked down the hallway from the entrance and dipped his head into an alcove
that was outfitted with a desktop, bamboo desk and chair, a hammock and a
chaise lounge. Little Neecy, his six year old had on her beats headphones and
was watching a That’s So Raven episode on an app. He hugged her from behind but
she broke away from him and pushed him out of her personal space. Out of the
alcove to the foyer.
He
gave a playful scowl. Such a roundabout reaction from when he had arrived back
from his months abroad. Gone were the squeals of joy and happy, happy. Now he
was just old, fogey dad getting all up in her ‘all-about-me’ time.
Holding
his briefcase, still wearing his overcoat and scarf, he made his way down the
long corridor to the living room to the suite of bedrooms to the right wing of
the household.
Drawing
up close to the bedrooms he heard stirring sounds. Light murmurings and
whisperings. He frowned, and as he came closer to the third door to his left.
His frown deepened to a thin line. When he was able to make out the sounds of sex
and the familiar voices on the other side of the door, he blanched. He gritted
his teeth. Raised his fist, prepared to pong up a storm on the door. Hell,
break down the door if need be.
But
before he made the first barrage his mind went to his daughter. He took in a
deep breath. But it did nothing to calm his erratic heart. His raised, clenched
fist tightened. He forced himself to bring it down to his side. He walked past
a few more doors to his study. Opened the door.
“Yo!
I’m off duty until dinner. No interruptions.” He yelled before slamming the
door shut. He took a few calming huffs of air into his lungs. From the noise
coming from beyond his door he got the impression that the outcome he had hoped
for with his outburst was happening now. The occupants of the room where affair
was taking place down the hall had wrapped up and the person was now dutifully
making their escape out of the house.
Lincoln
hadn’t intended for them to get that far though. He removed his long coat and
scarf and draped them over the back of the sofa. Next off was his jacket. He
remained dressed in his waistcoat and tie. He pulled his waistcoat down from
the base to straighten it a little. Used two of his fingers to smooth out an
imaginary crease at his cuff before he opened his door and marched out into the
living room. His irate disposition concealed behind an outwardly calm exterior.
It
was there he came across his two sons. Deacon, fifteen, and Donte, sixteen.
Deacon was dark skinned, with lean good looks and an athletic build. Donte was
of fair complexion with sharp good looks and a crew cut. Both of them had his
eyes and full lips. And they were nearing his build in height every day.
Lincoln’s
eyes wondered from the two sitting on the couch. Deacon seemingly engrossed in
his iphone, Donte seemingly engrossed in the football match on the ESPN
channel.
Neither
gave him a greeting. He walked over to the couch and pulled both of their
backwards caps off by the flaps.
“Hey.”
Came Deacon’s reply.
“Not
in the house.” Lincoln folded both and slipped them under his arm. “I’m
confiscating these in the name of common decency.”
“Urgh,”
Donte made a face, “Daaad, you are so lame.”
“True
’dat. The lamest dad alive. Don’t forget to put that on my tomb stone.”
“Argh,”
Donte allowed his head to smash down on the back of the sofa rest in
frustration.
Lincoln
continued to walk briskly down the hall to spot Betty, Neecy’s babysitter
lounging in the chaise lounge with a phablet on her chest watching Neecy keenly
as she typed up a storm.
Lincoln’s
lips smacked apart. “Hey Betty, can I have a word with you a sec.”
She
looked startled, anxious. Her gaze was watchful. “Yea, sure Mr. L.” She set
aside her phablet.
“Let’s
go out to the entryway so we could have our little convo in private. Shall we?”
Lincoln nodded his head in the direction of the entrance. “After you.” He
outstretched his arm with a bow and waved his arm out wide.
Betty
beamed at him. “Merci.” She walked on ahead of him.
Lincoln
scooped down and gathered her phablet, her bag and jacket that had been tossed
haphazardly in the foyer of the enclave. Neecy did not pay either of them any
attention, off to watching an intense episode of Stoked on the compu.
Lincoln
walked unhurried behind her. He rushed, though to enter the security code to
unlock the front door. Smiling he waved his arm to invite her to go outside
onto the veranda before him. She smiled unwittingly at his gentlemanly gesture.
If she suspected anything untoward she did not let on.
He
brought his hand that held her things hidden behind his back out in front of
him so she could see them. He smiled at her as she took her things, believing
he was just seeing her out after having stayed to look after his daughter and
the household in between the time it took for Lincoln to leave work and come
home. Rees worked late nights as a Desert Chef in a popular restaurant in the
heart of the city.
He
held the jacket open for her and she pushed her arms through the sleeves. She
took her handbag and phablet from him.
“You
wanted to talk Mr. L.”
“Yeah,”
Lincoln smiled affably at her, “I just wanted you to know that you don’t have
to come here anymore. You’re fired.”
And with that Lincoln shut the door
soundly on the surprised look on the young girl’s face.
Lincoln,
seething, took a deep breath and marched over to the living room. He reached
over and snatched the remote from Deacon’s hand and the cell phone from Donte.
The celly, he pelted across the room and as Deacon yelled in horror Donte
shouted “Dad!” as Lincoln turned off the TV.
But
at the look of total calm on Lincoln’s face instantly caused the two young men
to clam up.
Their
eyes darted at each other and then on Lincoln. He knows, their expressions suggested
Then,
Deacon raised his arms and nodded both his hands in Donte’s direction, both his
index fingers extended at his brother, “This is all on him”
“No
way you not pinnin’ this shit on me. We all came together, deal with it.”
They
continued to argue until Lincoln raised his voice to fever pitch. “Hey!”
Lincoln raised his hands up in front of him, each held up an index finger. He
drew those two fingers together and brought the joined fingers to his lips. He
sighed. Closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. Still, he could not get himself
calm.
He
opened his eyes. Stared down at his sons. Gritted his teeth, hands on hips. He
started to lambaste them. The two boys eyes looked shifty. Their stance was
taken so they could run away at any second.
“Are
you guys completely and totally insane. Fucking your sister’s nanny - while
Neecy was in the other room.” Lincoln raised his balled fists, shaking with
fury from head to toe. He spoke through clenched teeth. “Father in heaven, save
me. I think after five tours of duty, this is the one that is going to be my
undoing.”
“Whoa
Dad, chill.” Donte held up his hands. “Relax. First of all, she is the one who
is nineteen, we’re the minors in all of this.”
“Yeah
Dad we did our homework. We’re the innocent victims. She’s the one who sucked
us off.”
Lincoln
opened his mouth, speechless.
Donte
reached over and patted his Dad on the back. “Yea and listen. We know you’re
worried that we could have gotten her pregnant but no need to worry. We know
better that to bring a baby into this house.”
“Yea
man,” Deacon held up two fingers, “Twice in the mouth.”
Donte
smiled, “Once in the behind.”
The
two teens bumped fists in front of him.
Lincoln’s
mouth was still gaping open. He closed his mouth. Opened it again. He placed
his hand on his chest. Took in a deep breath and blew it out in frustration.
“You two have one second to get yourselves out of my sight before I reach for
my semi-automatic.”
The
two took a second to look at each other before they each scrambled to get
themselves out of the livingroom and out of their father’s presence.
Lincoln
closed his eyes and sat down on the sofa. The colour scheme was a mix of white
and brown. Like the alcove. The sofa was a soft white. A white centre carpet
with a low table in the centre. The table was a wicker with dark varnish.
Lincoln put back on the T.V. and settled in to take in some highlights on
Bloomberg.
Continuation of the scene happens in Chapter 14…
CHAPTER 14
Lincoln
hadn’t slept a wink all night. He pushed the covers off, still fully dressed.
He moved from his bedroom into the kitchen and made himself a cup of warm milk.
From the kitchen he moved to the livingroom. On hearing the low stereo chatter
from the hall he went to check out the alcove and was surprised to note that
Neecy was sleeping, half of her body lolling over the seat, with the wireless
headphones from the P.C. capsized over her forehead. Lincoln cursed himself. Of
course. With Betty out someone had to make sure Neecy got to bed on time.
He
put down his cup and picked up his little girl. Balancing her on one shoulder
he picked up his cup and carried her to her bedroom. The house was a one floor
house with a basement that led to different rooms. Including a firing range, a
bowling alley and twenty car garage that doubled as a bomb shelter.
Neecy’s
room was a concoction of pink and white. It was big and had a mary-go-round
closet that housed all her every day clothes and pageant dresses. It was also
neat. Before Neecy had a baby sitter everything had been thrown all over the
place. She could never put her toys or clothes away and Lincoln could attest to
the fact that he never got on her case for anything. He put her in her Black
Barbie Princess Sheets. A token he had to have specially made for his daughter.
Kissed her goodnight and left her in her clothes for bed.
He
knew he ought to switch her out to her pyjamas. But he couldn’t find the
inclination to go through the innocuous activity. His mind was still reeling
from the complications of his boys fucking her nanny.
Lincoln
would love nothing more than to charge her over this shit. But he knew better.
He couldn’t afford the publicity this intel would draw to his family
considering his past, and his present as he was the aide to a Multinational
Corporation. In fact, the more he wised up to the sitch, he may actually be the one to have to pay up if Betty
started to realize the compromising position she had put his family in. He
doubted it. Unfortunately, the boys were right in thinking that they were the
victim in this case. Though victim is not the word he would likely use to
attach to them. He knew them better than anyone. And to be sure, by the time he
got through punishing them, they would need a feeding tube, and a good
psychiatrist.
Oh,
and on top of that, they’ll be pissing out of their ass for a couple of months.
Lincoln
heard the beep of the alarm system indicating that a car was at least within
ten feet of the house. It was around this time that Rees returned from the
city. He sat down on the sofa, put down his drink and kneed his shut eyelids
with his index finger and thumb. He heard the tell-tale beep of the security
system as Rees came into the house.
Lincoln
bent over and rest his elbows on his knees, clasped his hands together and
frowned fiercely at the T.V. screen. His mind on his boys. He mused after a
while that God was punishing him. For all the shit he caused his own parents,
his kids were acting out the same way towards him.
“This
is insane!” Lincoln roared, launching himself off the couch. Fists railing to
the heavens. He turned to see Rees staring at him perplexed.
Lincoln
gritted his teeth. “We need to talk.” He reached over. Rees stood at the back
of the sofa between them. Lincoln squeezed his shoulder, nodding to the
kitchen.
Lincoln
pressed forward and Rees followed. Rees wore a black Intuition Men’s Chef
Jacket with kimono collar. The buttons were hidden by the seam. He carried a
thin strapped bag. Smelled like bananas.
As
they walked Rees came up close behind Lincoln and Lincoln stretched his arm
around Rees’s waist. He hugged him close. His mind started to work off the
fresh assault of the situation. Rees presence added stability to his thoughts.
They
entered the kitchen. It was wide and elegant with a pleasant mixture of cool
steel and solid maple wood. The island was an impressive size. Lincoln lifted
Rees up with the one arm round his waist. Rees’ response was a demure “Oh,”
before Lincoln kissed away the surprise gesture and gave him a solid slap on
the rump before he pushed him to sit on the stool at the island. Lincoln took
the seat next to him.
“You’re
upset.” Rees made the matter of fact statement.
“How
did you guess?”
“I’m
telepathic. Your face and your outburst before gave absolutely nothing away.”
He joshed.
That
made Lincoln smile. He cleared his throat. “I, um.” He sighed. “I fired Betty
today.”
To
say Rees was stunned was an understatement. “You did what?!”
“I
caught her giving head to my boys. So yeah, it’s over.” Lincoln patted Rees’
hand that had gone limp on the table. “So it looks like that’s our catch-22,
we’re back to the drawing board on that one.”
“Wait-wait-wait.
Slow down there partner. You mean you saw her having sex with Deacon and Donte.
When? Tonight?”
“Yeah,
well I came home and …there was no denying what was going on in their room. And
they did not deny what was going on in their room- I was passing by…yes there
was nooooooo mistaking what was going on. Praise God I did not go in there.” He
rolled his eyes. “Just imagining it.” Lincoln slapped the side of his forehead.
“Even though I didn’t see any of it I still can’t get the image out of my
head.” Lincoln covered his face with both hands, shaking his head. He sighed once
more. He looked at Rees through splayed fingers. Rees expression drew a
perplexed look to Lincoln’s face. “What?”
“Sooo,
you caught her having sex with them, and you just decided to fire her, on the
spot?”
Lincoln’s
eyebrow raised. “Yeeees.”
“Without
talking to me first?”
Lincoln’s
brow furrowed. He gripped both sides of his own neck with his hands. His elbows
on the table. “I guess…but I mean: it is
sort of a no brainer sitch babe.” At
the withering look Rees gave him Lincoln shot back sceptically, “Come on-are
you seriously pissed at me about this. SHE WAS BANGING MY BOY’S. Both of them,
at the same time.”
Yeah, right. Like if
only one of them were involved it would have been less of an issue.
Lincoln
gave a frustrated breath. He scrubbed his hair back with both hands. “I can’t –
I can’t see how this could be an issue right now. I’ve got to get them
counselling. I have to go through that shitty talk with them again. I got to
get them tested…” Lincoln raised his eyes to the heavens. His voice became whinny,
“Please don’t make them have anything, please,
please, please…”
“So
you fired the nanny, the one person I could depend on for any kind of free time
and you don’t think that there might be a problem in this.” Reese shrugged his
shoulders in frustration, “And how do you suggest we find a way to take up the
slack in all this? Who is gonna look after Neecy when school is out and I have
to go to work and you work late, like, every night during the week.” It was
Rees’ turn to give Lincoln the raised brow.
“Ho-ho-ho.
Surely you jest? Are you freaking kidding me?” Lincoln was flabbergasted. “She
was fucking my kids Rees. I was not going to wait until you got home to act on
this shit. She’s pretty darn fucking lucky I didn’t beat the door down and ring
her fucking neck. Shit.” Lincoln got up and kicked the stool he had vacated. It
fell with a clatter and the noise was damning in the silence between them. He
reached down and put the stool upright again. He hunched down, still standing,
crowding Rees, sticking his index finger to the top of the table a few times to
prove his point. “There is no friggin’ way you are going to catch me out on
this. No-friggin’-way.”
Rees
stared, the feeling in his eyes; seething. “Did you even consider, or think to
wait to ask me first? Is it because they’re not my kids, Lincoln? Is that it?
Say it. Say it. Is it because they are not my sons, but yours?”
Like hell I’m going to
say that shit. Lincoln stepped back and pocketed
both hands. His upper body leaned back, away from Rees. His eyes were
shuttered. Lids low. His expression inscrutable.
Rees
looked unhinged. Lincoln felt alarmed by the negative response. “Look, I’ll
take up some of the slack. I’ll be there for them...I’ll pick Neecy up from
school...”
“How
are you going to manage extra time for the kids when you can’t even manage
extra time for the two of us? Huh?” Rees hissed. “You only like to be around
for the cool dad stuff. Remember.
Serious shit just isn’t your deal.”
Lincoln
gritted his teeth at the quip he had made in the past concerning the kids care
being thrown back in his face. But that was all in jest. Crap. He kicked
himself in the nuts mentally over the one liner now. “I think I’ve proven
myself ten times wrong over that aspect.” Lincoln folded his arms. An
absolutely unfriendly giant. “I’m sorry Rees, but you could come up with all
the shit you want to and throw it back at me. But this time my actions were not
unjustified. I had to-”
“You’re
always making quick, upfront and important decisions like this without discussing
it with me first. I admit what the boys, and what Betty did was egregious. But
at least we could have retaliated behind her back. Kept the boys away from her,
until we found someone else more suitable for the job. My work schedule is
heavy Lincoln. So is yours. And with all the background checks you insist upon,
how are we going to deal with a lag in not having a nanny for the next few
weeks? Dante and Deacon obviously lack the core judgement to be looking after
her. We can’t even trust them not to fuck another one of the help.” Rees
slammed his open palm on the table.
Lincoln
snorted. “I won’t use Bastard Economics when it comes to my own sons.” Lincoln
shrugged, leaning his hip against the table. “I’ll get someone, by tomorrow.”
Rees
snickered, “That is beside the point. You’re always putting us in shitty
situations like this. And you never discuss things over the kids care with me.
You treat them as if they are solely your own, as if I don’t figure into your Daddy and me equation. I won’t friggin’
stand for it Lincoln. Not this time.” Rees got up and marched out of the
kitchen. Viktor sauntered behind him, head bowed, his thumb rubbing back and
forth on his bottom lip.
When
he reached the doorway of their bedroom he caught sight of Rees yanking clothes
from their walk-in closet, tossing them on the bed. His brows clenched, he
frowned, looking down at the clothes on the bed. “Ahem,” Lincoln’s voice was
amused, “What gives? These are my clothes.”
“Yes
they are. And you’re not welcome here Lincoln until you can decide exactly
where you plan to take this relationship you’re having with me. Because it sure
as hell isn’t the same relationship I’m having with you and the kids.”
Lincoln
opened his mouth, then shut it. Then opened it again, but words still failed
him. He closed his mouth again. “You’re kicking me out. Of my own house?”
Rees
walked over to him, his lips thinned. Grabbing Lincoln’s clothes off the bed he
walked over and shoved the clothes into Lincoln’s chest. “And don’t come back
until you’ve figured out exactly what type of relationship you want with me and
our kids.”
**********************************************************************************
So, I guess I’ll address the part in purple first:
First of all, it is not “Bain” it is “Baine”.
I’ll address the second part in red now:
I love that description, I think it is the best. I can’t
believe I was that good enough to convert my thoughts on how I saw it in my
mind onto the page. I’m a much better writer than I thought.
Gee, that is my writing style. Can’t help it. My influences,
besides the contemporary authors, and studying Shakespeare and stumbling upon
Jon Donne lit, I love manga and comics. I am a huge fan of Rumiko Takahashi.
Learning about her is what drove me to get my degree first and to pursue a
writing career after I got my degree. But to never give up on writing. I
cherished Inuyasha and Ranma and a Half. I thought it was excellent, “a boy
named pantyhose”, a bucket of hot water that would miraculously appear out of
nowhere…priceless. Also, a half dog demon that was commanded to sit by a girl
that fell through a well to the feudal era in Japan. I don’t care how good a
writer you are, no one can touch Rumiko Takahashi. All I can say is, expect
that out of this world writing from my work. Especially since I am writing
science fiction/ fantasy. Urban-Romance drama is what I use as a humanizing
aspect of my writing. Romance is a major indicator of motivation of my
characters. Much like in Inuyasha and Naruto.
Fanboys, don’t knock the romance in Naruto. Naruto felt love
for his brethren, Sasuke, and it drove his ambitions. Sasuke’s unrequited love
for his brother drove his ambitions. He loved his brother, his brother killed
off his clan, and his love for his clan drove him to seek retribution for their
deaths.
Now for the blue part:
This is the part that cracked me up the most. Because it
gave the impression that the entire book was centered around the action of
Lincoln’s sons. Which I must reiterate, the best writing in the novel. I can’t
help it, it’s bombastic. Every time I read it, I can’t believe it came from me.
I have seriously come a long way as a writer.
Anyway, I don’t get what the review means about not using
the Lolita Complex as a cardinal rule for writers. There was a movie recently,
starring Jennifer Lopez called The Boy Next
Door where the Lolita Complex is
utilized, very well in fact.
The Lolita Complex was termed by an author called, Trainer,
based on the book Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. Using the Lolita Complex to drive
plot is fairly easy. What you have to do is portray the young participant in
the relationship as the aggressor, and the older person as the one being
aggressed upon. You don’t have to be a genius to incorporate the literary
technique into a plot. Everyone from Danielle Steel to Oscar Moore who wrote A
Matter of Life and Sex have utilized it. Also countless romance novels. There
are a number of books where teenagers are engaged in sexual activity, many of
them coming of age so…don’t get the bulldozing, rough-shod complaint in the blue
text. ;)
Also, it is most brilliant in that, if this reader was
intellectually inclined to dissect the scene (meaning if they had background
training in literary studies) they would realize why the scene was added into
the story.
No matter how you feel or are accepting of Lincoln’s and
Rees lifestyle, any parent would be abhorrent of coming home to finding their
children having sex, no matter if the kids were having sex with a girlfriend or
boyfriend their own age, or someone older. Doesn’t matter. It is unacceptable.
Therefore, Rees’ compromising Lincoln on how he handled the situation is
ludicrous. Anyone and Everyone would take Lincoln’s side. He did the right
thing by throwing out the babysitter. Duh. No matter what, no one would take
Rees’ side. That is why the scene was added in. And please note how brilliant
the scene is.
Anyone reading the scene from the get-go would believe that Lincoln
just walked in on his partner having sex with another man, when in fact it was
his kids. How good is this scene. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! And the scene is not even
graphic or gratuitous or any of the sort. The whole scene is implied and described
without great detail. Excellent. Yes, I know.
And Doctor Who looked at E.R. Baine and said, “Clever,
clever girl.”
Yes I know I’m a brilliant writer. But like I told my professor
ten years ago, who has time for Harvard…Do you know how much work I’d have to
do to get into Harvard. I’m a fan of Jamaica Kinkade, but I don’t love her work
that much.
I think my writing is just too extraordinary for this
reviewer to…using simple words now… “get”.
As for what is in green:
Too good not to
repost, the part where this reviewer spoke to me directly:
E.R
Bain, EVEN THOUGH CALLED YOUN ADULTS, 15 and 16 YEARS OLD ARE STILL CHILDREN,
SO DONT YOU EVER AGAIN DARE TO SEXUALISE CHILDREN IN YOUR BOOKS AND CALL IT
Salaciously Seductive ROMANCE. Don’t you ever again dare to make reader feel
dirty reading one of your books as you did with me. And don’t you ever again
offer me one of your books: in a writer – reader relationship, this reader
wants a divorce due to the irreconcilable differences.
Oh my
gosh, very new to me. I have never, ever been schooled in my writing before.
All I have ever heard in my life is praise. I am truly humbled. I shall print
this part out and stick it on my wall.
Once
again, the name is E.R. Baine
N.B.: I did not in fact address this
review with unkind dissent. I merely addressed the review directly. However, I
am aware that no matter how jovial a tone I use, people are going to take
offense with a writer addressing a review. As though we should just sit back
and let people have their say without incident. Popycock! I believe my fans
would get a kick out of reading this. It was made public and was not emailed to
me in private, and the reviewer spoke to me directly, obviously the reviewer
intended me to respond. And addressing it goes toward describing my Theory of Authorship for my fans. But notice I did not reveal the reviewer’s name and I
am not condoning any ill will towards the person. Please do not badger this
little old lady.
UPDATE: You know what is so weird. I am right now re-editing this text for an update and I am finding so many things that need to corrected: (wondering should be wandering; desert should be dessert...There are so many other things this person could have called me up on I really can't believe right now that this person read the text to begin with. They just signed up to school me directly for no reason, and that does not help others who are genuinely interested in finding new authors who like writing for this genre. And it doesn't help the cause of indie authors either.
UPDATE: You know what is so weird. I am right now re-editing this text for an update and I am finding so many things that need to corrected: (wondering should be wandering; desert should be dessert...There are so many other things this person could have called me up on I really can't believe right now that this person read the text to begin with. They just signed up to school me directly for no reason, and that does not help others who are genuinely interested in finding new authors who like writing for this genre. And it doesn't help the cause of indie authors either.